


You'd better push the button and let me know

by JaneSpendlove



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: First Meetings, Gen, I have no idea how fast elevators move, It's moving though, Office AU, Snark, Trapped In Elevator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 12:19:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13570455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JaneSpendlove/pseuds/JaneSpendlove
Summary: “I said ‘hold the doors’! Didn’t you hear me?!”This tone was a lot less sing song. “Uhhhhhhh.. no?”, was about all Iwaizumi’s frazzled brain could manage.“That’s funny because your finger is still hovering over the door close button. That couldn’t be because you heard me coming and tried to close the doors, could it?”This tone was now saccharine and accompanied by a tilt of the head and a smile that was slightly too wide. Warning bells were going off in Iwaizumi’s brain as he guiltily tried to subtly bring his arm back to his side.The intruder (this was meant to be his elevator, dammit) narrowed his eyes a fraction more before slowly and very deliberately pressing the buttons for all 50 floors while trying to incinerate Iwaizumi by the power of his gaze alone.“Well looks like this little trip will take longer than you thought. I hope whatever you were in such a rush for isn’t too important, Hedgehog-chan~”.





	You'd better push the button and let me know

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the "AUs for when your OTP are both assholes" [prompt list](https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard/blog/janespendlove/170450220200):
> 
> I saw you trying to hit the “door close” button in the elevator but I made it in and then I pushed every single button to make you later for work, but now we’re stuck in this fucking elevator as it stops at every single floor and I don’t know what to say other than “you started it” AU.
> 
> This is a shameless excuse for me to write snark. Title from Sugababes - Push the Button (it was that or Aerosmith, heh)

Iwaizumi had been having a nightmare morning. First of all his alarm didn’t go off and it was only by the grace of whatever celestial being watching over him that his body clock woke him up only 20 minutes late. He didn’t have time to grab anything to eat and his feet managed to find that one loose paving slab that sloshed freezing, dirty rain water up his pants leg and over his shoe while he was running to the station. To compliment the loss of his toes to frostbite, he nearly lost an arm catapulting himself into the train carriage as the doors closed. As he squelched his way from the train station to his office building, Iwaizumi silently thanked his past self for being practical enough to have squirrelled away some spare socks in his work desk drawer. One too many tangles with that paving slab had taught him that he absolutely detested having to sit all day with wet feet. Trying to dry socks under the hand dryer at work was just too much effort and not worth Makki’s comments about the supposed smell. His office was relaxed enough that he could get away without wearing shoes while waiting for them to dry. He’d just have to avoid speaking to Makki unless it was while he was sat at his desk so his feet weren’t visible.

The promised comfort of dry socks made him lengthen his stride and he practically jogged across the lobby of his building to the bank of elevators. Iwaizumi felt like his bad luck might be over already as he noted that the usual press of bodies waiting for the elevators was absent. The push of the call button was followed almost immediately by the chime of a waiting elevator (and a muttered “thank fuck”) and Iwaizumi gratefully stepped inside. He needed this ride up alone to compose himself after such a manic start to the day.

He turned to look at the mirrored back of the lift to check his appearance since he hadn’t even had time to look in the mirror this morning. The quick footsteps of someone else coming towards the elevator echoed through the lobby as he tried to ruffle some life into his hair .

“Sorry buddy, not today”, Iwaizumi muttered while turning to push the “close doors” button. He felt a little guilty but a couple of minutes to breathe would be welcome and a rare luxury in such a busy building.

“Hold the doors~!”, came in a singsong voice that made Iwaizumi instantly start to push the button frantically. The last thing he wanted this morning was some peppy small talker accompanying him.

The doors finally began to slide shut and Iwaizumi began to relax again when suddenly a foot appeared between the doors with a disembodied “ow”.

Iwaizumi continued to stare at the offending foot for a couple of seconds while the doors almost apologetically began to shudder open again. He bitterly noted that this foot appeared to still be dry and was attached to a leg clothed in well-tailored trousers. He also couldn’t stop himself wondering how much leg this foot needed as he dragged his gaze upward. Iwaizumi’s fake apology died on his lips as the doors revealed perfectly tousled chocolate and cinnamon hair and eyes that were no doubt beautifully matched, but it was hard to tell when they were narrowed in accusation.

“I said ‘hold the doors’! Didn’t you hear me?!”

This tone was a lot less sing song. “Uhhhhhhh.. no?”, was about all Iwaizumi’s frazzled brain could manage.

“That’s funny because your finger is still hovering over the door close button. That couldn’t be because you heard me coming and tried to close the doors, could it?”

This tone was now saccharine and accompanied by a tilt of the head and a smile that was slightly too wide. Warning bells were going off in Iwaizumi’s brain as he guiltily tried to subtly bring his arm back to his side.

The intruder ( _ this was meant to be his elevator, dammit _ ) narrowed his eyes a fraction more before slowly and very deliberately pressing the buttons for all 50 floors while trying to incinerate Iwaizumi by the power of his gaze alone.

“Well looks like this little trip will take longer than you thought. I hope whatever you were in such a rush for isn’t too important, Hedgehog-chan~”.

_ Hedgehog?! _ Iwaizumi began to bristle at the smug smirk that accompanied the words before deciding that a calmer approach would probably piss this guy off more.

“Actually I wasn’t in a rush at all. I just wanted a bit of time to myself after a hectic morning.” Iwaizumi settled himself into one of the corners, crossing his arms as the elevator started to move. “You’ve actually done me a favour giving me more time, so thank you”. He tried to ignore the chill of his lower leg.  _ Could he live with only two toes if he lost the rest to frostbite?  _ The elevator doors opened to the empty hallway of the first floor.

“Oh.” The intruder blinked, obviously a bit thrown by the calm reaction before flicking his hair out of his eyes and adopting an air of nonchalance again. He spread his hands magnanimously, “Then you’re welcome, Hedgehog-chan.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Well I don’t know your name so what else am I meant to call you?”

Iwaizumi took a deep breath and tried to retain his aura of calm. “It’s Iwaizumi, or you could just not call me anything since talking isn’t necessary.”

The intruder settled into the other corner but instead of making himself more compact, he spread his arms out along the railings on either side and leaned towards Iwaizumi. “That’s not very nice, Iwa-chan. We’re stuck together until you get off on whatever floor you’re on.”

“Whose fault is that?!” Iwaizumi could feel a scowl forming on his face.  _ What was with this jerk? _ “And don’t call me  _ that _ either,” he growled as an afterthought.

“Surely it’s your fault,  _ Iwa-chan _ . If you had just held the door like a gentleman and a good citizen then I wouldn’t have needed to take corrective action.” There was a wiggle of fingers towards the elevator console and the too wide smile was back in place.

Iwaizumi glanced at the console - they were only at floor 7. Iwaizumi closed his eyes, counted to five, and gripped his biceps in an effort to control the urge to smack this guy on the back of his perfectly coiffed head. “I said don’t call me that. If you’re going to insist on talking to me then can you tell me your name?”

The intruder smiled wider. “Oikawa Tooru. Oikawa-san to you, since you clearly need someone to teach you some manners.”

Iwaizumi stared at him and could feel his eyebrow twitch. “Just stop talking and maybe this will go faster.” He didn’t trust himself to say more and was relieved when the intruder – Oikawa – just smirked and finally leaned back into his own corner. Floor 10.  _ Sweet Jesus. Ok, he could do this _ .

Iwaizumi closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing, trying to forget the morning and mentally preparing his mind for the day ahead. Doing so made him aware of the pleasant scent that had filed the small area. It was spicy and warm, but with a sharp undertone. He quickly realised that it must be Oikawa’s cologne.  _ Focus Hajime _ _. _ The steady pinging of the elevator arriving at every floor was actually quite soothing. He decided that once he got to his desk and changed his socks, he would go into the kitchen and get some coffee while his computer booted up. He had two deadlines today and the projects just needed proofed. He could start the longer one first to make sure he had more time to focus on that..  _ What was that noise? _

A tapping noise had appeared. Iwaizumi cracked open his eyes ( _ how were they only half way through the floors?! _ ) and tried to look at Oikawa in his peripheral vision. He didn’t want to risk eye contact and more conversation. Oikawa had begun drumming his fingers on the railings in a ridiculous rhythm.  _ For fuck sake, could this guy not just wait silently? And did he really need such long limbs?  _ Iwaizumi knew he was taller than average but Oikawa still had a couple of inches on him. Oikawa was wearing a dark blue button up, with the sleeves rolled up to just below the elbow. That expanse of skin just emphasised the tapering of his forearm to his wrist and, oh look,  _ long _ , graceful fingers. Iwaizumi’s eyes followed the line of those stupid, obviously toned arms to a fairly broad chest. The guy obviously worked out and looked after himself. Iwaizumi could appreciate that. As a fellow gym rat. Nothing to do with the way the shirt seemed to just highlight the litheness of his body to draw Iwaizumi’s eyes down..

“Yahoo~ Iwa-chan, my face is up here. Ogling strangers in the elevator, how uncouth.”

Iwaizumi could feel his face start to heat up as he snapped his eyes back up to Oikawa’s face and pushed himself out of the corner to stand facing his new nemesis. Oikawa hadn’t moved from his lounging position in the corner. Instead he’d just slid his eyes to side eye Iwaizumi with a knowing smirk on his face.

“I wasn’t ‘ogling,’  _ Trashykawa. _ ” The elevator was suddenly boiling. “I was just about to tell you to knock off the tapping.“

“It’s okay, Iwa-chan. It’s natural to develop a crush on the great Oikawa-sama –.“

Oikawa was interrupted by a ding and an “ohoho” as the doors slid open.

“Oikawa- _ sama  _ now is it? When did you get the promotion?”

Iwaizumi watched as another man, also taller than him, stepped into the elevator and leered towards Oikawa. Iwaizumi nurtured the small feeling of satisfaction that came with the realisation that this bed-headed newcomer was also taller than Oikawa. He also took note of the way Oikawa’s expression soured.

“Ugh.. Tetsu-chan you should know the  _ –sama _ goes without saying when I have to share space with peasants like yourself.” Oikawa had straightened up out of his corner and it seemed to Iwaizumi that he was trying to make himself as tall as possible.  _ Which should be easy with those dumb legs. Who needed that much leg?! There was no need for this asshole to be so tall. _

 

Iwaizumi needed to change his train of thought.“Do you just give everyone a nickname, Trashykawa?”

 

Kuroo let out a bark of delighted laughter “ _ Trashykawa _ ! Oh this is too good, wait until I tell Kou about this one. You’ll never hear the end of it, Oikawa. “ Kuroo continued to snigger as he looked at Iwaizumi from under a rather unruly fringe. “And yes, he gives everyone a nickname. What did you get?”

Oikawa spoke up before Iwaizumi could answer. “This is Hedgehog-chan. He’s as prickly as his hair suggests.”

Kuroo nodded sagely as he turned to look at the console. “Okay, Hedgehog-chan, tell me, why are all of these floors highlighted?”

 

Iwaizumi gritted his teeth. “It’s Iwaizumi. And I have no idea why Oikawa decided this was necessary.”

 

Kuroo raised an eyebrow. “Oh, I can think of a couple reasons,” he said, before sliding a sly smirk in Oikawa’s direction. Iwaizumi wasn’t sure due to the ridiculous hair covering half of Kuroo’s face, but he had the distinct impression that Kuroo had just checked him out. He fought the urge to retreat back into his corner. Only 10 more floors left until his and he was on 49. If there was a merciful god, he would be free from both of these idiots before then.

 

“Testu-chan! That’s not.. That isn’t.. I’m sure I don’t know what you’re implying!” Oikawa was now steadily going more red. He’d stepped across the small space to stand more or less in front of Iwaizumi. 

 

Once again Iwaizumi couldn’t help from noticing how damn long Oikawa’s legs were. The trousers were tight enough to show that the legs were muscled as well as long and that was an ass that spoke of many hours squatting in the gym.  _ How long have I been staring?  _ He quickly lifted his eyes before he was caught and found himself drawn to the blush going all the way up Oikawa’s neck to the tips of his ears.  _ Cute.  _ He met Kuroo’s knowing gaze over Oikawa’s shoulder.  _ Shit. _

 

“This brute deliberately tried to stop me from getting in the elevator with him!” 

 

“Surely not, Iwaizumi,” Kuroo deadpanned, clearly enjoying this.

 

“What else was I supposed to do, Tetsu-chan? I couldn’t let such terrible manners slide. It would drag down the reputation of this building as a whole!” The elevator doors pinged almost as a form of punctuation.

 

“Mmmmhmmm.. Oikawa, you’re babbling. Try to rein in the thirst,” Kuroo drawled. “Well kids, this is my stop. As much as I’d love to see how whatever this is-” he gestured between Iwaizumi and a still sputtering Oikawa- “plays out, some of us have work to do.” He shoved his hands in his pockets as he walked out. “One of you could have gotten out at any stage and taken the stairs, that’s all I’m saying,” floated down the hallway in his wake.

 

Oikawa stuck his head out of the elevator briefly to yell, “I hate you, Kuroo!” down the hall after him, before jabbing furiously at the close door button.

 

An awkward silence filled the small space. A blush was still high on Oikawa’s cheeks. A couple of floors later Oikawa seemed to shake himself and moved to stand in front of the doors. “This is my floor, Iwa-chan. I hope you feel privileged to have shared this space with the great Oikawa-san. I’d say it’s been fun, but, well.. you know.”

 

As he exited the elevator, Iwaizumi lunged forward to hold the doors. “Maybe I’ll see you around at lunch some time?”  _ What the fuck am I doing. _

Oikawa stared at him with wide eyes before giving a surprisingly shy smile. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Ummm.. Okay. Cool. See you around then.” Iwaizumi ducked quickly back inside before he could make a bigger ass of himself. He could feel a smile playing on his lips.

He finally made it to his floor and was able to settle into dry sock heaven with all toes still intact. He may or may not have been in the process of opening up the building directory of contact details when someone violently rattled his chair. “I thought I smelled something weird.”

Iwaizumi swung behind him on instinct and revelled in the grunt of pain “I swear to god, Makki, not today..”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure what happened with the para spacing, sorry! 
> 
> I read the prompt list in the morning and just had to get this finished before I went to bed. I had to throw Kuroo in there cos I love him and Oikawa together. They're such a mess.
> 
> Thank you so much to [Heather](http://miya-atsumu-miya-osamu.tumblr.com/) and [Kate](https://worthlesspride.tumblr.com/) for looking over it for me! Your feedback means a lot!
> 
>  
> 
> Come talk to me about snarky brats on my [tumblr ~](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/janespendlove)


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